"I'm Moving On"

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~The First Cut Is The Deepest~

The first time I cut myself for pleasure, I was in 9th grade. I didn't know why I was doing it except that it felt good. It was a high like nothing I'd felt before. It was the worst pain and the best but it was my pain. One I could control unlike the rest of the misery I felt in my soul. It was a Saturday night and like always, Mom was at work doing over time she wasn't paid to do and Dad was in bed. I honestly don't remember where my sister was. I imagine in bed or out at a friend's house. My brother was in prison. It was his first stint there for breaking and entering and wouldn't be his last. I was lonely. Like always, the feeling of need and desperation was like a hole in my heart. I couldn't fill it with anything but attention and what I knew well~Pain... I remember going to the kitchen. It was dark except for the light on the stove.  I quietly went through the drawers and the knife block to find a knife that no one would miss. When I found it I s...
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Its the truth....

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~ The Silencing Of An Abused Voice ~

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